April 19, 2006
I showed her…
Got this off the internet while surfing. I’ve read that before which was posted by Nigel some time back, since it’s damn funny and worth to keep, i’ve decided to blog it instead.
joke starts here
==============
From a guys point of view……
I never quite figured out why
the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have
figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out
why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR
EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into
bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says:
I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…
"You’re
just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to
satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying:
"Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The
very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one
to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was
testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t
even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I
said, "That’s fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction
from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she
finally said, "I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier." I
could hardly contain myself when I blurted out:
"No honey, I don’t feel like it."
Her
face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT?" I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough
for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can’t you
just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either….but at least that biotch knows I’m smarter than her.
